Thursday, February 10, 2011

now we begin

i was called in dreams to write to this: "the one we are", so now, a year later a blog emerges. i will not always spell my words or use grammar ( i typed in grammer. lol) correctly, but you will know what i mean, and digest it in your own way, regardless of the "correctness"of it all.

the launch of this blog finds me with a heart full of tears-sadness, opening my heart. and so begins the first dribble on the "one we are", the experience of being human.

i see the sadness in people, in myself, i feel it clogging most people.. the older, the more dense it is. ahh, the fruits of being an empath. and a good reason to be a hermit at times, or have practices to make clear the experience inside my form.
and it strikes me that in our current culture/society.. we seem to struggle, strive and seek for happiness. huge sections of self help books, masses of books-cd's-practices... seeking happiness. have the humans always sought happiness like this? and it seems, when i cry from grief, i feel this shame, that if i am crying , then i am not happy. but i would like to propose that experiencing our sadness or allowing it, might be a path to happiness. and maybe it becomes not a path TO happiness, but a path at least to inner emotional health.. or maybe just peace :) and instead of cursing the pains we may feel, i am gathering as i grow, that they are nessesary parts of the whole. NOT! i repeat NOT! that you might negate yourself to the idea that you can only experience joy as deep as you feel saddness.. but that you (and me to!) allow yourself to truly feel, whatever song it is that wants to move through the soft animal of your form. and i, bodly?- will try this out and am sharing/exploring/digesting, the very thing that scares us- sad-grief-loss, for this is the adventure i am being asked to move through.

when the grief is clogged in me, i feel it- achs, tired... and so it calls to emerge. and it is not such a shotty gift to offer the world around me, i am thinking.

if a picture is worth a thousand words, then a moment with hunter was worth a thousand pictures. and
and i leave you with some of each:


"and when i too, move from form, 
we will fly without shadows"

the naked trees of winter, whisper in the breeze. and i know this sound, so different in every season.. and i welcome the birds flapping over in flight, the song of the trees, cold winter air moving into me. waiting for spring to melt the frozen tears over the wounded boulder of my heart. dressed in blues and black.

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